Laid to rest..

Laid to rest my goal and ambition..

set aside the driving force..

that got me where i am..

throw everything away..

why you ask? why indeed..

for someone who has found the light..

its easy to be fooled, have blinded sight..

but the warmth it wreaks, all to familiar..

I think, I'll stay and lay to rest..

Lay to rest all that is against it..

to put out all i see besides my light..

let it go, leave it be, no regrets..

A heartbreaking choice none the less..

Oh well i say thats just the way..it has to be..

Forged..

I am not you I am my own..

Mistakes of the past

not set in stone..

To be copied

Reiterated over again..

I am my own I run my course..

In an image and likeness

but not a copy..

A great honor and privilege..

but will never be the same..

As I come of age..

I am my own, You are with me..

But I'm not you..

Physiological Suicide..

I'm Tired I'm bored..

Tired of being tired..

Tired of being sad..

Tired of the pain..

Tired of everything..

On the verge but i see light..

Webs of purpose entangle me..

Silver linings of the heart..

Shining, Gleaming me through..

I snap back desperately holding..

To these latches..

Embrace this symbiote..

Never to let go and unbind..

Only to save my state of mind..

Why rhyme?

I ask myself as i take time..
Why Rhyme?
Some sort of scheme perhaps?
A flash? a Synapse?
a need?
Ah yes the harmonious
and synonymous sounds
that i breed..

Angry? sad? happy?
It does not matter..
Just glad.. and also hungry..
to provide, decide and to
improvise.. words so concise..
and witty..

Random Thoughts..
come in and collide..
Endless imagination..
won't subside..
Combine create and write my part..
In some ways my own personal art?.

Wala Lang..

Isip ng Isip..
Para lang may
maisingit at maisulat..
Ladlad ng ladlad..
Para lang may
maiipt at maibuklat..


Ewan ko bakit nga ba
Sinusulat ang isang obrang..
sa aking pananaw ay mukhang..
wala lang naman..
Baka masabing ako'y nahihibang?.

Hindi! isang taong napapagtanto lamang..

Naisip na kahit wala lang ay pwede din..
Isulat isabuhay at sikaping likhain..
Isang diwa ay bigyan ng pangalan..
Kahit ang realidad ay ito'y wala lang..

Master..

Lay it down Give it up for the Master..
Such are my ways are Unorthodox..
My allegiance forever to the Cross..
I sit down and quietly Worship..

My savior and My strength..


Although guilty in more ways than one..
Never again to turn away and shun..
Forever my answer and my light..
My wing and feather as i take flight..

Soar high the mighty sky and glide
With my master by my side..

Redemption..

Brought down,slapped back
Knees on the floor..
Turned back knocked down..
Opportunities out the door..
And Shut..

Exhausted and untrusted..
life stands still..

Desist not to resist..
Break the doors wide open..
Fight for my place..
toil work and persist.!

When it comes..
Prepare! make haste!.
Prove your worth..
And hold our ground..

Soon much deserved redemption..

Will be Found!

Vast..

A mysterious and intriguing figure..
Subliminal endless beauty..
Forever kept a secret..
nonviable and untouchable..

The Sea..

Much Like my journey..
so vast and unknown..
I swim by halfhearted and weary..
fears of the unearthed, undiscovered..

Shrug it off swimming on..
Cover as much..
As my feet get tired..
And my arms feel numb..

My scope revealed..
Vigor renewed..

And I swim on..

Agnostic State..

As I grow up my Faith grows weary..
Flames of youth now reduced to ember..
I realize the inescapable truth of reality..
and my belief turns meek..

No more will I fight the inevitable.
Just agree with a reluctant nod.
Accept what's present..
Let go of what's absent..

A feeling of limbo as I mature..
that goes along with the wave and flow..
Tired of swimming against the current..
Just let it be washed away..

and what remains.. Will cope.. And Make do..

Inkblot..

Writing my story, running out of ink..
Pondering of an endless inkwell..
A source of material and inspiration..
a useless effort the more i think..

A wish to grasp the mystery of life..
Defining my purpose and my meaning..
Welcome to my agony and my strife..
As i struggle to find the silver lining..

A mystery it seems as i can't write..
I wonder why my pen is blotting..
I continue on and write despite..
Keep writing on with all my might!.

Endless..

An endless chain of love and hate..
As I'm set free still no escape..
As I reject the same effect..
I still invite with all my might..

Feelings I've shun so very far..
Still comes back without my knowing..
Ups the ante raises the bar!.
Forever there. Still.. but growing..

We grow apart we grow together..
We grow apart I grow stronger..
We grow apart and never linger..
But starts again with another stranger..

Alas the chain of hate and love..

Labyrinth..

I seal myself to avoid the hate..
Further within as i create..
A maze so deep there's no escape..

Only those A chosen few..
Can find their way..
Make it through..

Find me at the end..
Waiting for a sign..
For people and kin..

I can call mine..

360..

It only takes One..

One mistake to change A life..
One decision to make it right..
One chance at redemption..
One person for your salvation..

One more try to say the least..
One more effort to contain the beast..
One more chance to look away..
One more chance to avoid dismay..

One last moment of Dark and Gray..
One last sorting to this disarray..
One last time for you to need..
One last time for me to heed..

My Light...

Standing outside waiting..
For the one keeps me breathing..
Set aside the effort and the hassle..
For a glimpse of my fair damsel..

Alone I sit but not to whimper..
A reason enough to stop and hinder..
The wailing and screaming inside my hole..
A Chance. Redemption, To save my Soul..

Here I am and I finally write..
In the midst of darkness i found my light..
On the Month of July of 8 plus 10..
I've Finally found my Love again..

For Simplicity's sake!

Everybody wants perfection..
Everybody wants it all..
What's wrong with a little mediocrity?..
For simplicity's sake..

Always striving for that mountain top..
Never Paying attention as a whole..
Looking at appearances..
Stricken with all the grievances..

Simplicity Disperses stress..
With it you'll find nothing less..
and with it there is no dismay..
if only we could live this way..

Slip on My Blinders!

Slip on My Blinders as a refuse..

to see a light so bright..
that blinds my senses..
defeats the purpose..

Introducing a sense of Prejudice..
Beneath it's shining exterior..
Never changing..
Never understanding..

Keep it simple keep it clean..

Never judge by what is seen..

Perfect is never really right..
When you use the sense of sight..

Cover my eyes and be liberated..

Trust the heart and not the eyes..
And as I open, I realize..
A light that was false, oh so faded..

Empathy..

In an interview with Louie once..
it was said that the only thing..
that saved him from damnation..
and from himself..

conscience..

now I find myself..
in the same position..
this is where I draw my line..
between sweet and bitter..

salvation and damnation..
Never over indulgent..
Never stationary..
just giggling at the sidelines..

as i swing the pendulum..
but never linger..
my allegiance a riddle..
as I am caught dead in the middle..

Breather..

A big whiff of fresh air..
as i leave my shell..
where i spent..
the entirety of my past..

wake up and smell the coffee..
get up and hear the seraph's singing..
as new nebulae bloom ripe..
just right for the picking..

renewed vigor..
rise up to the plate..
embrace who i was meant to be..
no rest for the wicked.....

blood pumping organ...

i dare not call..
this organ which was once..
the center of everything..
now only a hole..

biologically keeps me alive..
emotionally blank and empty..
"moments" bring back..
fragments but only momentarily..

never whole.. kind of sad..
but it's quiet and I'm glad..
to get away from all the noise..
and just be in my own hole..

of the part that shall not be named.. no longer..

Everyday Jitters..

everyday I'm afraid..
everyday the wall grows bigger..
the feeling gets heavier..
as the day unravels..

shake it off, fight it out!
everyday my strength grows..
everyday my mind ripens..
the fear remains..
but courage lingers..

Seraph..

came as a surprise..
caught me from behind..
an exclamation point..
to a new found life..

a momentary lapse..
from my ongoing..
emotional skepticism..
a wonderful feeling..

as the dawn breaks..
everything reverts back..
the spark disappears..
left in the moment..

Solace in a Stick

Late at night I light up..
I sit, wait and ponder..
Of all that was, that is..
that will be.. I wonder..

I think not between the lines..
Of bitter nostalgia and false hope..
But rather look forward with..
optimism with every smoke..

A touch of solace with every hit..
And I'll never regret each moment..
Of peace and solitude..
As I pay with grief and torment..

Come judgement day..

Amour Propre..

Forever centered never to waiver..

Never to bow.. never to kneel..
Once a fool never again..
Bask in glory..enjoy..savor..

No where to look but up above..
Nothing to fear but fear itself..
Forever be my one true love..
No one but myself..

Petron sa Filinvest..

sa malungkot na gasolinahan..
habang nagaantay ng masasakyan..
ako'y nagtatanto, nagiisip..
tapos nanaman ang ligaya..
kelan muli magbabalik?.

palatandaan ng pagtatapos..
pagtigil ng kasiyahan..
kahit ito'y pansamantala..
ang oras ay bumagal..
na tila nangaantala..

habang ang dilim bumabalot..
nakakabinging katahimikan..
kalungkutan sinasakop..
katauhan ng unti - unti..
kelan kaya makakauwi..

ayan na ang jip hangang sa muli..

Pedestal..

Lingering..
even after old flames..
burn out.. disappear..
faint ember remains..

Mounted..
up above.. set in stone..
unreachable, inextinguishable..
efforts in vain..

Behold..
observe but never to touch..
forever adoring and observing..
only bathing in the warmth..

unable to bask fully in the light..

Enigma..

oh such a bother..
so distinct yet unpredictable..
so simple yet unstable..
enigmatic presence..

mind boggling mind fuck..
always opportunistic..
when all defenses are weak..
oh how sadistic..

yet such alarming appeal..
like treading hot coal..
I say burn the soles! through the fire!..
As I move with a masochistic smile..

Viewfinder..

From my viewfinder i can see..

lives constantly changing, evolving..
every time my shutter blinks..
a moment preserved in my memory..

My moistened viewfinder..
blurry images are captured..
still ever changing, evolving..
falling apart, lingering as memories..

My hopeful view finder..
continues to capture every moment..
waiting, anticipating..
for memories to once again..

become reality...

Hope..

In my Darkest hour..
A Gleam of light shines through..
a small crack from my cursed jar..
Giving a sign of HOPE..

To break restraints..
To move along..
To prove my worth..
Ah tis what i need.!

When i was on the precipice..
and in the midst of an epiphany..
the universe hands me..
my 1st break in a long while..

ONWARD then..

Stagnant

Ang Hirap!..
Naiwan sa loob ng isang garapon..
hindi makagalaw..
hindi makakilos..
masikip at hindi makahinga..

Mas Mahirap..
Hindi Maipakita..
Sa kanilang mapanghusgang mata..
ang lahat ng makakaya..
sapagkat naipit sa mumunting garapon..

Darating din ang panahon..
na mababasag ang garapon..
ngunit sa ngayun ay mananatiling nakaipit..
sa isang lugar na walang magagawa..
kundi maghintay...

Miracle...

The Feast of the Black Nazarene..
A truly wonderful and gruesome sight indeed..
millions of people struggling for their slice of heaven..
and going through hell to get it..

I admire everybody's search for miracles in this world..
I used to be one of these people..
Hoping for everything to fall into place..
Oh such naivety..

Hearing two quotes changed my perspective about this concept..
"Be the miracle"
"Do not askthe Lord for guidance if you are not willing to move your own feet"
Such Simple word but it made a whole lot of sense..

If everyone would able to apply this philosophy into their lives..
then that can be truly called a MIRACLE..